ALL RIGHT ALREADY

Okay, okay, sheesh. Everyone's clamoring for a recent picture of me, so here:



Happy?

Oh, Survivor is coming later. I have to watch the tape again. YES, I watch it twice - once for enjoyment, and once for you. Why? Because I love you. And I'm not just saying that so you'll give me head. Although I wouldn't object. And I'll call you tomorrow, I promise. Why would I lie? I JUST TOLD YOU I love you, and guys take those three little words very seriously. So come on. Please? Guys have needs, you know. Ever heard of Blue Balls? Did you know they can KILL a man if he doesn't get to release? No? All right then, screw it, I'm taking you home. No, don't talk to me. You're just being selfish. I wonder if your little friend with the nice ass might like to go out sometime. No, I think it WAS called for. You never think about what I want. I paid for that whole evening out, too. NO, I don't want 'your half'. If you keep talking I'm just gonna keep turning the stereo up. Damnit. There they go. It's just like being kicked in the nads over and over, but do YOU care? NO. So be quiet. Unless you're opening your mouth to say "Yes, Kevin, I will help you not die from exploding testicles", then I don't wanna hear it.